the carolina reaper is the hottest pepper

in the world. it has a heat of 2.2 million

scoville units. when you put a carolina reaper in

your mouth, it is sweet & then hot & then

unbearably hot. your eyes water. your metabolism

increases. this is a poem of facts. the carolina

reaper is named the carolina reaper because

it was first bred in south carolina & the sensation

of eating it is like death. the scoville scale

is named after wilbur scoville, a pharmacist

from bridgeport, connecticut. he shared

his name with one of the wright brothers,

a famous pig, & my boyfriend’s dog. this

is a poem of facts. the wright brothers

owned a bicycle shop & built their own

printing press. the famous pig was famous

for not being eaten. my boyfriend’s dog

is half chihuahua & half chinese crested &

is not famous. this is a poem of facts.

a chinese crested named sam held the title

of world’s ugliest dog from 2003 to 2005. sam

died in 2005, ugly until the end. he

was hairless & toothless & had bumps

of an unknown nature on his face. this

is a poem of facts. my boyfriend’s dog

is also hairless & missing most

of his teeth. the carolina reaper

is covered in bumps called blisters, as are

the mouths of those who try to eat them.

this is a poem of facts. wilbur wright

was born before the carolina reaper

& is best known for inventing the airplane, our means

of flight. he died the year wilbur scoville

invented the scoville scale & the two of them

never met. you thought this poem

was going to be a poem about peppers & instead

it is a poem about wilburs, a poem of facts

about wilburs. when wilbur the famous pig

managed not to be eaten it was because

he was saved by a spider. when wilbur

my boyfriend’s dog manages not to be eaten

it is because i love him & my boyfriend loves him

& we do not let him go outside when hawks

are around. when i say this is a poem of facts

i mean it, i mean i am being as factual as i

can. when wilbur wright died, his brother

missed him for the rest of his life.